Yesterday I failed.
I failed at ignoring drama and ignorance.
It would be easy to blame the other parties but I HAD the control to ignore or answer.
I chose to answer.
I am mad at myself for choosing to do so.
When you know yourself it is important to trust yourself to do the right things and at times we do not do that. We say naw, I can handle it knowing fully that we cannot. I know who I am and people who chose to think that they know me can continue to do so. I know that I have to get away from negativity and STAY away from it. Not just when it benefits me. No… Once you fall into the trap of negativity it is hard to get out until it is too late. That is what happened to me. Hurt people spew hurt. And the truth of the matter when it comes to some past relationships I am hurt.
Questions I have had to ask myself over the past day:
WHY am I still hurt?
Why am I wanting to carry and hold on to this hurt?
Why I am I choosing to continue to go back and forth?
If I am over it then I am over it, someone saying something should mean NOTHING.
When words are spoken in a direct way to get you riled up think before you react and speak. I am a firm believer that actions speak louder than words and my actions are out on display. I am human, I know how I am (sensitive as ever) and I know when I should log off on the internet instead of spewing back the hate.
Yesterday “Black Girls Rock” aired and I was on a high from the positivity flowing but then I saw some negative and went the other way and forgot all about the positive vibes and energy I’d been in all day.
How does that make me look?
I say to myself and you who is reading… if you feel yourself going a direction you KNOW that you should not be going STOP. DROP. and LOG OFF.
There is nothing more embarrassing than reading your reactions to what you could have ignored the previous night.
Don’t let this be you.
This is the LAST time that this will be me..